you are not sure what you see

‘is it a man or is it a woman?’

but what you see matters not

not to me

i do not seize to be

i do not exist to be

what you see


my heart

why are you crying?

has life not been fair to you—

not been good to you?

have you stopped beating for beautiful things?

are you company-starved—

yet company no longer warms you?

i wonder that myself sometimes…

you take in so much—

you must burst!

but it becomes everything or nothing—


every impression, every notion, every sound

humans turn to moving dots

cold and soft

floating across the fields of vision

while few remain in your heart

will they too float away

like yourself some day—

and then

who ever held yours?

a prayer

a prayer



whatever mighty forces out there

merciless Mother Nature

unbending Father Time

fateful Fate

protect the children of this earth

your children

let them seize to suffer under hand

let them meet this life fully formed

not broken and scarred before time

let them see before you take away sight

let them feel before you take away heart


if I were a supernatural being—

if I could

I would swallow the darkness coming their way

carry the burden myself

and let darkness swallow me

roam my inner being only

and protect them from harm

but—gods help me!—I too am human

too human

I am frail and weak and protective of myself

I cannot help but repel unwanted darkness

then how do I carry any burden

beyond my own?

i’d rather hear the roar of machines

than the inner beasts of man

i’d rather smell the burn of tires

than the quiet fire of souls

i seek an emotion that must be pure

not conflicted and cracked to splinters

yet i forego notions of completion

to become one with life

is neither one or the other

darkness slips into light

and i do not accept my mind

numbed to the facts of life

but indulge in fantasies beyond my measure

so terrible and alone

and when the last breath escapes

i see my body of work

and silently weep for the pain